Earl Got Your Tongue? Oprah Got Your Tongue?
DATELINE New York, 34 minutes past Oprah.
Technically/theoretically, it has been Oprah Week, courtesy of Bazima Media, here at Bazima.com. You may or may not have noticed this. Here's what's been happening:
1. The Oprah Show has been a week of repeats, since O is evidently still off partying with her personal heroes in exotic places that you can't afford to go to. (Someone at Bazima Media should have checked their local listings. Someone is so fired.)
2. Our own appearance at this month's Cringe Night, during which a famous person - so not naming any names, or whatever - publicly suggested that, basically, maybe we should DO IT, meant that all of us here at Bazima Media were unable to focus on anything but ourselves from "Tuesday night" until "right now."
3. Today's repeat O Show featured a full hour of Denzel Washington, which Bazima Media does not wish to comment on at this time. Or ever. And you're welcome!
4. This week on "30 Rock", Tina Fey's character, Liz Lemon, said - and I quote - "I do whatever Oprah tells me." Or something like that. When I heard that, I was all, "Ha! Someone has been reading bazima.com this week! And it's not my mother! Because I don't even think she's read it."
Bazima Media, blazing a trail in 2007.
This is not only The Chinese Year of The Pig, people. It is The American Year of Oprah. And The Brooklyn Year of Blaise. In my apartment. By myself. Talking to the TV.
Speaking of "30 Rock," they showed the new Claire Danes Gap commercial, which (have you seen it?) is the worst Gap commercial I have ever seen in my life. Uncle Grambo filed the marketing strategy under Frankensteining, which I like. Really, the commercial is almost unwatchable.
Speaking of commercials, I was on the phone with Sarah Kelly today at about 30 minutes past Oprah, and we were talking about the fact that someone we know and considered un-hitchable is totally getting hitched. I was saying to SK that if this person has actually been popped the M question then that must mean something good for us. Because everything is about us. Let's bring it back to us. Anyway, so, into the phone, I was saying in an admittedly chick-lit sort of way, "This means there is hope for us!" And guess what happened? Cingular (the new AT&T) DROPPED THE CALL. I was all, "...Right? That means there is hope! ...Right? ....Sarah?" It was EXACTLY like those drop-the-call commercials! That was fun. And funny. Especially since those commercials are advertisements for Cingular, which is the fucking service that I WAS USING.
These last two paragraphs may not have had much of anything to do with Oprah Week exactly, but I thought they were nicely segued.
Previously on Bazima Media's Oprah Week Coverage:
• OPRAH SAYS
• Oh, and speaking Oprah...
