And we all float on okay.
Imagine if Sean Penn came paddling up in a boat to rescue you from your hurricane-hit home. I'd probably be so happy I'd forget about the urge to punch him in the face. I'd probably think wow he looks old! And then I'd call everyone I knew and tell them they'd never believe who just saved my life. And also I'd ask Sean how he sees his relationship with Madonna, looking back on it 20+ years later. And then I'd tell him that 1983's Bad Boys is still one of the best movies I've ever seen and that I can't believe he's the same person who played Jeff Spiccoli in Fast Times at Ridgemont High and dog bless him for it. Then I'd get his address and send him a Free Katie T-shirt.
What if one hundred celebrities got together and flew into New Orleans and started helping the stranded evacuees? Salma Hayek floats in on her tetons! Julia Roberts picks up debris with her teeth!
This is my favorite email of two days ago. Someone sent it to me sans source but I imagine it's from Gawker or some such site that I wish I still had time to read:
Leto
Last night on Conan O'Brien, Thanksgiving-ruiner Jared
Seconds To Mars performed as the "musical guest."
Needless to say, it was hands down, up and over the
ears the worst bit of LA neo-garbage to ever come out
of the Late Night speakers. Really, it was horrible in
ways we couldn't have ever possibly imagined it being
horrible.
Anyway, the real fun began about 3/4's of
the way through the song when Leto, get this, stopped
the music, informed the nation that he has family in
New Orleans, asked for a moment of silence, waited all
of 3 seconds, turned up his white Mexican knockoff
Gibson Dave Grohl, opened his enormous pie hole and
bleated the remaining lines of Attack into that poor,
poor microphone.
(Note to Leto-my-eggo: cred-checking
bullshit ties to terrible natural disaster during the
remaining 2 minutes of a late night talk show on which
you are "the musical guest" soley because you are a
movie star, yet refuse to acknowledge -except when
it's convenient- due to your moon-sized ego eclipsing
those big, beautiful, movie star blue eyes is, like,
so going to get you raped in hell by a thousand
flaming dildos.)
Meanwhile I've donated one of my photographs to this Katrina Relief Auction the proceeds of which will go to the American Red Cross. I've little doubt that the organization will receive the money raised. I'm just not confident about what they'll do with it. Like using it to pay some fat cat's bloated salary. The Charity Navigator does offer some helpful resources and tips. Even if most of the tips are like duh.Also, they list the Red Cross as one of the top 4-Star rated organizations helping victims of Katrina. What does that even mean? Who did the ratings? Celebrity film critic Gene Shalit?
UPDATE: My photograph sold for 50 bucks to a nice man in San Francisco.
