Not all of this is true.
Remember in second grade when I slipped and fell face down onto a patch of ice in the dark and got a black eye and then presented it the next day for Show And Tell?
Remember when the power went out that one Friday and I threw a temper tantrum because I was afraid of missing an episode of "Miami Vice" during primetime, and it was only four o'clock in the afternoon when the blackout happened?
Remember when I was four and the television fell on my hand (and left a scar that is highly visible to this day) when I tried to pull the TV forward because I couldn't get close enough to it?
Remember when I got in trouble in kindergarten for taking Melora Hawthorne's hand and biting it really hard because she was really fat and her hand looked so juicy?
Remember when I loved Elle Magazine because it was different than all of the other fashion magazines? It was all glossy and big and had new models and did a feature and fashion spread with Lisa Bonet?
Remember when I was on "The Cosby Show"?
